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23 Sep '11

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I'm a New York native who left my home to explore the world slowly and thoroughly. I’m just a little obsessed with photography, scuba diving, and reading guidebooks to countries I have no immediate plans to visit.

Everyone told me, you, Alex. You must read Untamed

Everyone told me, you, Alex. You must read Untamed.

And so sitting down on my beach trip, my spontaneous, illogical, ridiculously indulgent beach trip, it felt like just the time.

“This is the most revolutionary thing a woman can do: the next precise thing, one thing at a time, without asking permission or offering explanation. This way of life is thrilling.” — @glennondoyle

I highlighted like crazy, but halfway through this best seller that touched the hearts of so many, I asked myself — why is this not clicking for me? Why am I not having the spiritual experience so many women have when reading this book?

And then I realized that the reason is one of the things in life I am most deeply grateful for: I never really was tamed.

How lucky am I?

I ponder often what to credit to nature and what to nurture. And I have fought hard, my entire life, fueled by some spark inside me, to resist the one-size-all box that society wants to squeeze women into.

But, I can’t take all the credit — though I didn’t fully comprehend what a trailblazer my mom really was until she was gone. Recently I came across an impromptu journal entry she’d jotted on the vintage stationary of a Holiday Inn in rural Illinois in 1978. She was twenty-three, living in a trailer and in a dangerously bad marriage, and it was her first night ever alone in a hotel, a freedom she reveled in. Shortly after, she was divorced and moving across the country alone to start a masters program in public health. Untamed.

I was nineteen when I flew across the world by myself and stayed in what I believe was my very own first solo hotel room — a dingy windowless budget guesthouse in Bangkok that I forgot to write down the address to and barely arrived at, without a smartphone. Though I was choosing a life path that at the time terrified my parents, they never tried to dissuade me (well, my mom did beg me to dye my hair brown and had one night of sobbing and asking why I couldn’t go to Europe instead, but fair’s fair).

And so I was untamed, too.

Continued in comments 🥥

That “flew to Mexico on a whim” feeling 🙌🏻

Last month, I was in a slump. I’d been having a tough stretch at work, Mother’s Day was approaching and I was feeling unsettled, and I just couldn’t remember the last time I’d done something that made me feel 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥… a feeling that, I’ve learned, I really refuel on.

Looking ahead at my calendar, I saw an incredible year stretch out ahead of me… one of working my dream job at @wanderwomenretreats, one of celebrating my amazing friends at their weddings and bachelorettes and showers and birthdays, and one of quality time with my family over our favorite holidays.

What I saw very little of, in this year in which we are trying very hard to put two years worth of life and love into, was space for me to be spontaneous, to be unscheduled, to be selfish, to get lost, to be irresponsible, to go somewhere quiet and listen to my own voice, to answer to no one, to just be… wild. Wild, raw, primal me.

I had, in fact, just five days. So, while my friend who I’d just been confessing my angst to went to the bar to grab us a glass of wine, I opened my phone and booked a flight for eight hours later to the last place I’d really felt those things. I booked my accommodation on the in-flight WiFi and texted my friends in Mexico upon landing to let them know surprise, estoy aquí.

And that’s how I found myself, exhausted, poorly packed, and deliriously happy in Sayulita, Mexico.

Exactly where I shouldn’t be, if logic, my to do list, financial prudence or sensibility were the deciding factors.

And so, exactly where I needed to be, instead.

To be continued ✨

Barefoot on warm driveway asphalt. Sunsets over th

Barefoot on warm driveway asphalt. Sunsets over the Empire State Plaza, and that skyline view from the freeway. Fireflies along the Hudson River. The smell of the front yard in the house I grew up in right before it rains. Tulips, tulips everywhere 🌷

These are the reasons that I always found myself coming home from abroad in May. Mother’s Day weekend, it seemed, things Upstate just turned beautiful. A few recent trips around that time reminded me of that.

Most of my time in Albany these days is pretty hectic — working towards the seemingly never-ending goal of cleaning out my mom’s house (which I am grateful to be able to do slowly and methodically) and repacking for my next destination (plus going through the mail that piles up since I often still use Albany as my shipping address!).

But I always stop to smell the roses — or tulips — with loved ones ☺️ Wandering Washington Square Park on a lunch break with friends, sneaking my favorite empanadas into the Oscars shorts, pizza in a backyard garden filled with laughs, an Earth Day cleanup at my favorite local cidery, and even uncovering treasures as I go through the difficult process of releasing from my family home.

Savoring these fleeting moments Upstate as I get back to my old life but reflecting fondly on the best parts of the tough times I spent here, too.

I love you, Upstate New York ✨

Life as an Amtrak frequent rider 🙌🏻🚊 Can

Life as an Amtrak frequent rider 🙌🏻🚊

Can you believe I’m currently on my fourth trip to Philadelphia since Spring? These photos are from my third, a spontaneous trip to see @lunaticatlarge (who just wrote a blog post about her trip!) The first was for Easter, and the second was for my sister’s confirmation. Thank god for Acela!

I’m hopping back on planes a lot more frequently these days, but for a long time I was just bopping around the northeast by train between New York, Albany and Philly! And still kinda mostly am!

It’s been a joy to get to know my sister @oliviabaackes’s city better and spend time with my girl @tripwhisperer who is now a resident too. Feels like I’m creating a little PA crew of my own 💙

I wish I could have done more touristy stuff with @lunaticatlarge and @scottyvsquared on this trip but I booked so last minute everything they had reserved was sold out — one of the downsides of spontaneity, these days.

Oh well, luckily I’ve got a lifetime of visits here to my sis and future bro-in-law, so I’ll have plenty of time for all the tourist stuff.

PS: Still have never had a cheesesteak 🙈 Please leave top Philly tips for when I finally do hit the tourist trail!

Here for the right rieslings 🙌🏻 (It’s a B

Here for the right rieslings 🙌🏻

(It’s a Bachelor joke and an upstate wine reference all in one — how clever and modest can one blogger be?!)

One of my favorite discoveries of the spring in New York was @rooftopreds, the world’s first commercially viable rooftop vineyard — located right in the Brooklyn Navy Yard!

The views were as good as the flights, and the pizzeria downstairs even delivers to the rooftop! 🍷🍕And if you wanna keep the party going after, New York’s oldest whisky distillery is right downstairs.

You don’t have to make the long trek out to North Fork or up to The Finger Lakes for great New York Wine — it’s right within the five boroughs. (But like, you should probably plan trips to those places too anyway, cause all of the above are 🤌🏼.)

I do feel like this is a hidden gem — so many New Yorkers have told me they had no idea it existed! So save this post or tag a friend you wanna bring as a reminder to make a reservation for your next New York adventure. It’s the perfect New York date night!

Thanks for being mine @sky.so.young + @liz_zmo 😘

What’s the coolest winery you’ve ever been to?

My work and my world — are they one and the same

My work and my world — are they one and the same? 💻✨🤍

They used to be. No question about it. To get one small business off the ground, let alone two, I put in years + years of crushing, relentless time and energy. Gosh, I was so driven.

But I have felt a change within myself. I still feel passionate about my work, I still feel blessed to be able to do it, and I have a clear vision + big dreams for my businesses.

But, I 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 less.

Or maybe I should say more. I want rest. I want hobbies. I want guilt-free time with family. I want lingering afternoons with friends.

The last year-ish forced me to ask big questions about who I am when I’m not constantly grinding through blog campaigns, or rushing to retreats, or signing exciting new deals. While parts were terrifying, I admit I found some freedom in it. What a strange feeling, in those early days when the world shut down, to wake up + not feel the crushing panic that someone needed something from me.

The last year-ish before that reminded me that time is the most precious thing in the world. That I’m not necessarily guaranteed tomorrow with my loved ones. I think back to times my mom asked me to go out to dinner with her while I was home + I insisted we get takeout instead so I wouldn’t be away from my computer for too long. What I wouldn’t do to shut my laptop and take her out to the longest dinner in the world, now. So I do with the ones left. And if an email goes unanswered or I miss an opportunity, so be it.

But the world is back to a million miles a minute — I’m expanding @wanderwomenretreats, offers are landing in my inbox left and right + I’m living out of a suitcase again.

It happened so fast that I’ve found myself pretty drained from what was once my standard lifestyle of being on the go go go. Recently I gave myself a major pep talk where I said Al, you spent the last year begging for your life back. Well here it is girl!

I do feel overwhelmed. I haven’t written on my blog in months. My accounting issues haven’t been solved. We’re in the midst of a huge team transition. I’m trying to write an ebook, launch a ton of retreats, + and get back to posting on my blog.

Continued in comments…

Taking steps… towards healthier happier me 🌸

Taking steps… towards healthier happier me 🌸

About six months ago, I was feeling… blah.

I put on weight (the COVID-19, I joked) due to a mix of having my go go go routine disrupted, comfort eating, and not having access to my favorite group workouts like sweaty yoga classes and weightlifting sessions. That’s fine — I’m grateful to my body for getting me through that crisis however it had to.

But that was just the physical symptom one could see. I was also pretty depressed, I was exhausted, and I felt confused and stressed about how to take care of myself.

As I’ve shared before, I hired a health coach, and really dedicated myself to a holistic approach to feeling stronger, more energized, and more empowered to make good decisions.

I knew the world would pick back up eventually and I wanted to feel ready for it, mentally and physically! Here are some of the biggest changes I’ve made since then.

1. I eliminated negative self talk. I put this first because I think it’s the most important. I simply no longer allowed it to be an option for me to talk about my weight or shape in negative terms. Once I stopped voicing negative thoughts, I noticed how much less I thought them, too. Now, if I feel a critical appearance thought seeping in, I just say to myself, thank you body for bringing me through this day.

2. I became more flexible in my workouts. Gyms closed? No problem, I started running. Don’t have a whole hour? Find, I’ll move my body for half of one. I still prioritize weightlifting and aerial as the movements I know most benefit my body, and yoga and cardio as the ones that most benefit my mind.

3. I went back to basics. In the last six months I’ve gone from store bought to homemade hummus, swapped oatmeal packets for steel cut oats, and cooked things I never thought I could. Travel kind of stunted my kitchen skills and I relied way too much on restaurants. But lately I feel so much less helpless — I don’t feel like I’ll die of malnutrition if there isn’t a fancy salad spot nearby. I’m so grateful for fresh nutritious meals (and am moving away from labeling them as “good” and others as “bad” and using this language instead.)

Continued in comments! 🙌🏻

Happy #WorldOceansDay! 🌊✨🐠 If you are wa

Happy #WorldOceansDay! 🌊✨🐠

If you are watching my stories, you know that I am in the Dominican Republic celebrating this amazing day with @iberostar, who’s @waveofchange program has actually W🌎Wed me. This is no “we print on recycled paper!” eco initiative. This is, first hotel chain to go single use plastic in 2020 initiative. Zero waste and 100% responsible seafood by 2025 initiative. Full carbon neutrality by 2030 initiative.

Sustainability in travel is my passion and to be totally honest I’ve heard the same ideas and initiatives so many times it gets 🥱. But what #Iberostar is doing is actually industry disrupting. I love it!

Over the next few days I’ll be exploring the #waveofchange coral nursery in Bavaro, scuba diving in Bayahibe, and dining in MSC and ASC certified restaurants at @Iberostar. And I’m taking you with me! 📱

I actually took this photo on #EarthDay in New York City — from where you can hop a quick and easy 3.5H direct flight to Punta Cana to get swept up in the @waveofchange yourself! 🌊 #ad

Tell me the last time you put your toes in the ocean!

Want to come to Lebanon with me and @tripwhisperer

Want to come to Lebanon with me and @tripwhisperer? 🌸

Lebanon is officially open without quarantine to vaccinated travelers — and I can’t think of anyone better to toast to #hotgirlsummer with than the Lebanese 😎 They really know how to live!

We’re going to celebrate life in style from August 21-28 by hitting Beirut’s iconic summer beach clubs, wine tasting in the Bekka Valley, heading to the country’s chicest surf town, and ‘gramming our way through ruins that could rival Petra — without the crowds.

Two spots may be opening on this trip — head to my stories for a swipe up and DM me to get on the waitlist for them!

This is the most popular trip I’ve ever released — it sold out in a snap with a long waiting list to boot! But it’s been a long time since then, and many folk’s circumstances have changed (or, their calendars are crammed with rescheduled weddings and conferences — like mine!)

While I never release a trip unless I’m fully confident it’s something that is truly a one of a kind experience, this trip is unique in that Lebanon is SO inaccessible to solo travel due to the lack of tourism infrastructure outside Beirut. Can it be done? Yes, but you’ll have to be enormously scrappy or enormously spendy.

Or, you can come with us — and enjoy stress-free with a built in crew of new besties! I felt SO lucky to experience Lebanon with an insider expat like Jess, and between her incredible knowledge and connections and my @wanderwomenretreats flair, I think we created something actually magical. I’m pinching myself over this one!

I was in Philadelphia staying with Jess after my sister’s big weekend (see previous post!) when we got the official word about Lebanon dropping the quarantine for vaccinated travelers — so of course we had to celebrate at @surayaphilly, the hottest Lebanese food in Philly! It was the perfect way to cap off two days of deep diving back into our trip to perfect every last detail.

So let’s do this! Tag a friend you’d love to go to Lebanon with — can’t wait to see who’s going to join us ✨ We are in for such a treat!

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